First Race of the Year For All of Us!
First Weekend in February 2007
Davis Stampede

Ah, the smell of Ben-Gay, the looks of "What the HELL am I doing out of bed so early?", the desire to cross the finish line just to get a $5 medal...

Yes, sports fans, another race season is upon. What kind of races this year, you may ask? ALL OF THEM! We don't discriminate here at the Borden household. And hell, we'll drag down as many people with us as we can. Our newest addition to the "paying someone else so we can run really hard for a $10 t-shirt" is Taryn. Yes, you saw her in the marathon pics. Yes, you saw her...wait, I haven't posted those gigs yet. More on Taryn a.k.a. Partner in Pain, later.

So why not start the year off with a big, fat bang! No sneaking in under the radar. It was time for a half marathon. Idiot. Seeing as I conquered (sorta) the marathon scene just 1 1/2 months previous, why the hell not try to off myself completely! Pain only lasts for a short time, but injuries are forever. Sigh. Memories.

Like I said, I'm taking others down with me. Terry ran the 5K while pushing Jack in the borrowed jogging stroller (Thanks, Lew!). Kudos to Terry for completing the race in a truly respectful time. The boy hasn't had a chance to even walk 10 blocks in the past year (damn job) yet he conquered the race with ease. Rock on. And for our boy, Jack?!? Why, the 1/4 mile kids race of course. He couldn't wait!!! He was getting a little miffed that mama's race took so damn long. (Sorry, kid, but that shit HURTS!) He was stretched out, lookin' mean and didn't want either of us to run with him. No problemo on the mama side, bud! Off he went at word "GO" and headed down the stretch. He was grinnin' the entire time. I think he enjoyed just watching all the other kids run, too! Reminded me of soccer last fall. He crossed the finish line with ease and couldn't wait to get his ribbon. But mama got a medal? Look, little dude, the prizes get better the more you try to injure yourself. All in all, he was satisfied with his ribbon and very proud of his accomplishment.

And my race? Was feeling pretty damn good until about mile five. Hmmmm...my left knee is REALLY starting to hurt. Fuck!!! I've got such a GOOD stride going! Not giving up. Not giving up. Saw some chick ahead of me limping off the course. Did she do the marathon in December, too? Are we both idiots?!? Still not going to give up. Oh shit! I see people I recognize handing out goodies around mile six. Smile! Pretend nothings wrong. Don't stop until you're around the corner. Can't...make...it...much...further... Had to stop. Fucker HURT!!!! I spent the last half of the race using the stop/go plan. I spotted a fair number of people hobbling off the course at various stages. But the one dude who almost brought me to tears was in TERRIBLE shape around mile seven. That dude had a limp goin' the made me feel like Carl Lewis. Wondered what was going to happen to him.

I don't even know my finish time. Really! I just concentrated on getting to the finish line for that fucking medal. As soon as my foot went over the line, I was hobbling so bad I thought I might collapse. "Motrin, please, with a hospital bed chaser. Thanks." While hanging out eating and waiting for Jack's race, the dude with the limp came in. He survived! Total miracle. He was TRASHED! He barely made it across the finish line. I think he may of even gone straight over to the ambulance. Smart move. Hey, man, if that guy can make it, I sure as hell better keep going. Inspiration.

Lesson learned on this race? It's really painful (and stupid) to do a marathon and 1/2 marathon all within 2 months of each other. Pain. Major pain. But, when you're as bull-headed and stubborn as me, you can't help but try to find new ways to wreck your body. Wait, isn't all this exercise supposed to be good for me? Where IS that fucking Motrin bottle...

Feelin' groovy, smellin' funky.